STOP THE SHAME\DEPRESSION CYCLE

 STOP  THE SHAME\DEPRESSION CYCLE

Shame fuels depression just like gasoline can fuel a fire. Depression is an ongoing battle in the mind,body and spirit that can feel overwhelming.You may feel like giving up at times as you struggle to find a light in the darkness and everything becomes such an effort in your daily life. The lyng voice of the demon of the spirit shame tells you that “you are not good enough” and that “everything is your fault” and that you have not made mistakes but that “you are a mistake”. It is difficult to have energy for life when you are struggling with this battle. and this very likely began in your childhood and now it is time for you to address the effects of your wounds so you can begin to heal as depression and shame do not have to be a life sentence You can come out of the prison you have been living in

IDENTIFYING YOUR TRAUMA TRIGGERS

 IDENTIFYING  YOUR TRAUMA TRIGGERS

A trauma trigger is anything that consciously or unconsciously brings back the memory of your trauma. It is a trauma reminder. When we go through having experienced trauma it takes time and attention to process how we are feeling and how what happened to us has affected us.. When we are overloaded with traumatic stress we go into the fright/flight or freeze response which is our bodies way of protecting us. However, if you do not receive the support and help,attention that is needed then these responses can get stuck in these trauma responses which will block your healing .Trauma triggers are a wake up call to show you where you are wounded and where you need healing. Therapy can greatly help you to focus on what is needed for that wounded place to heal as in therapy you can become more aware of your unconscious “ trauma triggers” as well as your conscious “trauma triggers” and see your blind spots more clearly as you gain deeper understanding...

RED FLAGS OF A UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIP

RED FLAGS  OF A UNHEALTHY  RELATIONSHIP

Relationships can be complicated as every place that we are not healed goes with us into our relationships. So basically, all relationships can be triggers. Relationships can provide fertile ground to help you to become more self-aware. As a result of this process, you can learn to identify where you have been wounded and have not healed. Healthy relationships provide the soil to plant seeds of healing and unhealthy ones plant seeds that “reinjure’. Our unconscious can be like a radar which attracts to what is “familiar” however if you came from a family that was dysfunctional then what is familiar can be unhealthy and toxic and yet you may struggle to be able to see and acknowledge this.

HOW TO STOP AVOIDING YOUR PAIN

  HOW TO STOP  AVOIDING YOUR PAIN

Depression is “anger’ turned inward. You may be struggling with a battle of depression that hit suddenly or very likely there is a long-term pattern of “shaming and blaming yourself. And feeling ‘not good enough”. You may be feeling helpless and hopeless although in worldly terms “you have achieved success”. Your feelings of emptiness and lack of joy may now seem to be running all areas of your life. This your wake-up call to no longer neglect and ignore your pain but to learn how to give yourself the attention you so need in order the healing process to begin1

HOW CHILDHOOD TRAUMA EFFECTS ADULT RELATIONSHIPS

HOW  CHILDHOOD TRAUMA EFFECTS  ADULT RELATIONSHIPS

As a child you were completely dependent and vulnerable:”like a little hostage”. If your parents were emotionally unavailable and not equipped to nurture and protect you by providing safety for you then a deep wounding occurs in your soul. If your family was one where your emotions were ignored, criticized, shamed, then you got the message at an early age that it is not safe to be “you” and in order to “survive” became disconnected from yourself. To be intimate with another it is essential to be self aware, vulnerable, and accountable.

ADULT PAIN OF CHILDHOOD EMOTIONAL NEGLECT

  ADULT PAIN  OF CHILDHOOD EMOTIONAL NEGLECT

Have you been denying and avoiding the pain inside?

Do you constantly need validation and praise but even when you get it you feel it is not enough?Do you struggle with identifying your feelings and have difficulties verbalizing your wants and needs in a direct way? Do you often feel that you are “not good enough” Are you overly concerned about the needs of others and fear rejection and abandonment?

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Do you shame and blame yourself when you begin to have angry feelings?

Are you “exceedingly” grateful for every “crumb” given in your relationships?

BREAKING THE CHAINS OF WORK ADDICTION

  BREAKING  THE CHAINS OF WORK ADDICTION

Are you noticing that your life is out of balance and you are becoming more emotionally and spiritually shutdown and disconnected from yourself and others?

Is it is getting more and more difficult for you to set boundaries and limits on time you are

working? Is it difficult for you when it is time to leave work to know that it is time?

Do you constantly ruminate about work and strive for perfection?

Are you exhausted and yet you do not know how to rest?

Are you starting to see that your addiction to work is related to your history of trauma?

MEN BREAKING THE SILENCE OF CHILDHOOD SEXUAL ABUSE

  MEN BREAKING  THE SILENCE OF CHILDHOOD SEXUAL ABUSE

Have you stuffed and minimized what happened to you in an attempt to cope?

Are you wanting to move forward but feeling unable to move and “stuck”?

Are you in a battle in your mind constantly and filled with shame and guilt?

Are you feeling depressed and anxious most of the time but try to hide it?

Has the wounding to your self esteem colored how you feel about yourself?

Is it difficult and sometimes feeling impossible for you to “feel safe” and “to trust’?

HOW FEAR OF INTIMACY EFFECTS RELATIONSHIPS

HOW FEAR OF INTIMACY EFFECTS RELATIONSHIPS

Do you feel and believe that you are :unlovable”? Do you fear rejection and abandonment and have built a wall around your heart in an attempt to “protect yourself”? Do you have a history of unstable relationships? Do you have a pattern of shutting down and avoiding what is going on inside of you? Do you have difficulty addressing conflict and either stuff your feelings or explode? Do your trust and self esteem issues stem from childhood trauma?

CHILDHOOD TRAUMA IS THE ROOT OF ADDICTION

 CHILDHOOD TRAUMA IS  THE ROOT OF ADDICTION

Are you becoming more aware “of how you avoid you” and that it is difficult for you to connect with yourself and others and how your addiction(s) fuels this “stuck” place? How does the disconnection with yourself effect your life now? Do you have many distractions that enable you to “numb out” and remain disconnected from the “war” within? Do you avoid conflict by “any means necessary” rather than address what needs to be confronted? Are you struggling with depression and anxiety and have times of feeling “hopeless” that you can ever be truly healed from all the pain/shame inside? Do you have an overwhelming fear of rejection and abandonment that colors all of your relationships?