Bilingual Trauma Therapy
Ronee Miller
FREEDOM FROM PARENTAL TRAUMA BOND

Trauma bonds can be extremely challenging to navigate as this bonding touches our deepest wounds. The intertwining between love and fear that began when we had no defenses to protect ourselves needs time and attention to heal. As we connect the dots and give and receive the attention and care we need: we are beginning the healing process to move into freedom and come out of bondage!

FREEDOM FROM PARENTAL TRAUMA BOND
Bilingual Trauma Therapy
Ronee Miller
EMOTIONAL NEGLECT AND PROCRASTINATION

When we are emotionally neglected as children our nervous system does the best it can to go into survival mode in an atttempt to protect us ... Since we are completely dependent and vulnerable and unable to “fight or flee” so we go into“freeze” response where we are numb and emotionally shut down in an attempt to not feel our fear and our pain. When no one hears or listens to our “cry” we lose hope as our emotional needs are not noticed or given attention and we feel like we do not exist..Over time our “little child” part gets more frozen and “stuck” and has difficulty moving forward and begins to internalize the emotional neglect and we as adults then begin to neglect ourselves emotionally and due to lack of hope and feelings of helplessness develop a pattern of procrastination and the root is “childhood emotional neglect”.

EMOTIONAL NEGLECT AND PROCRASTINATION
Bilingual Relationship Therapy, Bilingual Trauma Therapy
Ronee Miller
NEGLECT AND EMOTIONAL NEEDINESS

When we were the most vulnerable and dependent and “emotionally needy(”as we all have been as children )it can feel like a cry deep in our soul when no one hears or seems to care about us. Our mind, will and emotions are what define our soul. For many of us who have been “ traumatically wounded” in childhood: the message we received was that we will not have our emotional reality nurtured or have anyone who can help us to process our emotions in a” healthy” way. You may be becoming more and more aware and of the consequences that are affecting your self-esteem and your relationships as the“little boy or girl part” got stuck in a pattern of “emotional neediness” that needs to be healed so you can move on with hope and start to. understand what is going on inside of you emotionally physically: and spiritually. You may have stuffed your emotions and are now becoming more aware of the consequences related to your childhood trauma.

NEGLECT AND EMOTIONAL NEEDINESS
Bilingual Relationship Therapy, Bilingual Trauma Therapy
Ronee Miller
HOW TO HEAL AVOIDANT ATTACHMENT STYLE

The way that we learn to connect with others in our relationships is called “attachment style” .Our parents and caregivers play a crucial role i the style of “attachment'‘ we develop.. When as children those adults who are closest are unable to nurture us and be responsive to our needs then in order to survive we often “shut down” emotionally. An“avoidant attachment style” develops as a survival response to fear,, anxiety and feelings of rejection and abandonment.as there is a lack of a secure connection and trust.

HOW TO HEAL AVOIDANT ATTACHMENT STYLE
Bilingual Trauma Therapy
Ronee Miller
STOP BEING A DOORMAT

Doormats are exploited and dumped on. Doormats are used and often abused. Doormats do not have a voice. Before you can stop being a doormat it is essential that you actually begin to identify and see what the qualities of a doormat are. You may have been well-trained since early childhood to stuff your feelings and your voice and to be a “people pleaser”. and now you feeling depleted and believe the lie that you are powerless.but you are not!!

STOP BEING A DOORMAT
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RELATIONAL TRAUMA FROM PAINFUL BREAKUP

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RELATIONAL TRAUMA FROM PAINFUL BREAKUP

A painful breakup truly is “Relational Trauma” .You feel overwhelmed with so many conflicting emotions and they may change minute to minute or day to day. Important to remember that healing is a process and you are “going through the fire and coming out gold”. It is essential as you grieve that you also increase your level of self-care and that includes slowing down so you can give yourself the attention you so desperately need as you go through this very painful season of your life. Important not to make any important decisions during this time or to start a “new” relationship in an attempt to not feel your pain. This would not be wise as you need time to rest and recover so that you can learn whatever is needed for you to learn about yourself and your “true” value and that your wounds of the past do not control your future…this will take time and patience so that those wounds can heal and not run your life

HOW LACK OF EMPATHY FUELS DISCONNECTION

HOW LACK OF EMPATHY FUELS DISCONNECTION

To have a healthy relationship it is essential to have empathy. If you were raised in a family where your feelings were neglected or criticized, or shamed then it becomes difficult to have empathy for others.. To keep our hearts open it is necessary to have self-compassion. As without self-compassion as a foundation for empathy, there is a disconnection from self and others. Lack of empathy in relationships is the fuel for disconnection. To truly “show up” it is important to be able to see and hear past the words and behavior but with a capacity to feel and understand what the other is experiencing.

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BREAKING FREE FROM ENMESHMENT

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BREAKING FREE FROM ENMESHMENT

Enmeshed relationships are relationships that are overly close and lack boundaries and fueled by manipulation and control.:one person is there to satisfy the needs of the other and the other person’s needs are completely ignored .... The relationship is also fueled by inappropriate guilt and forced obligataion. Helicopter parenting often is the precursor of enmeshment and is directly correlated with anxiety and depression in chiildren and as they grow into adulthood.Helicopter parents who overly supervise and are mainly concerned about behavior and not the emotional needs of their child. often are planting the seeds of enmeshment to harvest.. Enmeshed relationships during childhood do not allow for healthy developmental progress to take place and children are set up for developmental trauma as an effect .Often this dysfunctional pattern which started in childhood is repeated in adult relationships as it is familiar and what is familiar is what the brain repeats until we lern new and healthier ways to relate to ourselves and others.

TRAUMA IS THE ROOT OF WORK ADDICTION

TRAUMA IS THE ROOT OF WORK ADDICTION

Has work addiction become your drug of choice? It is an addiction that is nurtured by the culture and often celebrated as a “part of success”. However, the truth is that work addiction like any other addiction is fueled and rooted in unresolved trauma. and is progressive and terminal when not addressed. You may have not noticed the toxic effects of work addiction until the effects begin to control your life and mind,spirit, body. Like any drug addict when you are taking the drug you feel good but then over time you need more and more to get that same feeling and the consequences become more and more clear.Work addiction effects every area of your life and relationships require for you to show up and truly be present. This has been one of the greatest challenges for so many of my “highly successful” work-addicted clients and has motivated them to seek therapy .

SIGNS YOU ARE NEGLECTING YOURSELF

SIGNS YOU ARE NEGLECTING YOURSELF

One of the most essential areas for you to not neglect yourself in: is giving attention to your emotional and mental health….in other words giving attention to your unhealed trauma wounds. You may not even be fully conscious that you have developed a pattern of “neglecting yourself” as you very likely are taking care of the “outside” and yet neglecting what is going on inside of you. We live from the inside out so when you neglect your inner world there are many consequences both inside and out..Our mind and our bodies work together and there are physical symptoms when emotions and memories get stuck in our bodies. The wonderful thing is that you can now choose to walk through an open door so you can heal and no longer avoid and move forward!

RAISING A SECURELY ATTACHED CHILD

RAISING A SECURELY ATTACHED CHILD

You have probably noticed by now that every place where you are not healed shows up in your relationships. So every place where you are wounded can become even more“up front and personal” when you become a parent. There are no perfect parents or perfect children but even if you were not securely attached and have issues related to that: you can still learn how to raise your child to be securely attached. During this process, there can be a parallel process of healing that takes place for you as well! So hold on and be encouraged as help is on the way so you can give a life-affirming relationship foundation to your child and both of you will be blessed!

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FEAR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND

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FEAR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND

Healing can only take place when we are calm. Fearful thoughts block the healing process and nurture feelings of anxiety as you most likely can notice by now.. It is like eating toxic food that cannot nourish you in any way but actually hurts you and makes you feel sick.. What you think and what you say make a great difference to your overall mental health and state of mind. So what are you feasting these on days is my question to you: is it gloom and doom, toxic relationships, catastrophizing, making mountains out of molehills, bad news reports online and on TV? Are you murmuring and complaining and wondering why you feel so alone and disconnected from yourself and others? Help and hope are on the way so do not give up!

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HOW TO HEAL AVOIDANT ATTACHMENT STYLE

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HOW TO HEAL AVOIDANT ATTACHMENT STYLE

The way that we learn to connect with others in our relationships is called “attachment style” .Our parents and caregivers play a crucial role i the style of “attachment'‘ we develop.. When as children those adults who are closest are unable to nurture us and be responsive to our needs then in order to survive we often “shut down” emotionally. An“avoidant attachment style” develops as a survival response to fear,, anxiety and feelings of rejection and abandonment.as there is a lack of a secure connection and trust.

STOP BEING A DOORMAT

STOP BEING A DOORMAT

Doormats are exploited and dumped on. Doormats are used and often abused. Doormats do not have a voice. Before you can stop being a doormat it is essential that you actually begin to identify and see what the qualities of a doormat are. You may have been well-trained since early childhood to stuff your feelings and your voice and to be a “people pleaser”. and now you feeling depleted and believe the lie that you are powerless.but you are not!!